Love Will Come Through
by caitlolz
Summary: Peyton and Julian AU. Peyton and Julian are in pure bliss while Lucas and Lindsey are suffering. Can one question change everything?
1. Crossroads of Highroads and Lowroads

**Chapter One: Crossroads of Highroads and Lowroads**

"I love you." the words coursed from Julian Baker's lips with uncertainty as he searched the eyes of the beautiful blonde that straddled him at the hips. He bit down on his lip as he awaited her response fearing the worst when silence hung between them.

Peyton Sawyer paused for a moment, something she had tried to no longer do. If she paused, she questioned things. When she questioned things they usually turned out worse than if she had just followed her instinct. Yet she paused looking back into the uncertain gaze of Julian, the sincerity of his words catching her off guard. She searched within herself, fighting the raging monster caged inside her chest. Then a smile formed upon her lips and she spoke four simple words.

"I love you too."

Julian smiled broadly meeting her lips in simple kiss, one they had shared a thousand times before, though this one never felt as sweet. Had Peyton doubted herself in the truth of her words, it was all but gone now as his firm hands pulled her close to him.

She had been more than cautious with Julian letting him guide their relationship. Eventually, all the pain and heaviness in her heart lifted and she felt free once more. Julian was like coming up for air. He saved her when everyone had all but jumped ship. He was there when everyone seemed to turn their backs.

He pulled her down on top of him, letting their bodies melt into the intimacy of the contact between them. Fingers entwined in her blonde locks, committing every touch and every graceful movement from her to memory. Kisses deepened coupled with a complex dance of their tongues as they moved in unison. Each article of clothing was removed with care and longing then easily tossed to the side like nothing mattered.

Their hands locked enlacing their fingers as naked flesh melted as they became one. A spark issued to ignite the fire that raged between them already nearing a need to jump out of control. They had had sex many times prior to this, but those instances were not quite as passionate in the wake of a beautiful revelation. Tonight Peyton and Julian made love.

---

Morning sunlight poured through the space between the drawn curtains causing light to fill the room. Peyton lay awake upon Julian's bare chest simply listening to the sound of his even breathing. The morning was peaceful, they way it used to be in Tree Hill. Now she and Julian had but not a care in the world as they lay spooned together.

Julian stirred slightly, his eyelids fluttering open after a few moments. Immediately his eyes sought Peyton, smiling when he saw she was looking up at him. He groped blindly for her hand, entwining their fingers when he found it.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked pressing a soft kiss to her forehead causing her to nestle close to his chest.

"I was just thinking of a happy memory." she responded softly tracing circles idly upon his chest.

"Really? And would this happy memory include me in it?"

There was a deep rumble in his chest as he spoke causing a light vibration against her ear as she listened to him speak. She gave a light nod. "Do you remember the first time we met?" her voice was barely above a whisper, had he not been listening for it, he would not have heard her.

"I remember both occasions quite vividly." he began stealing a glance to Peyton. "You were crying both times." she glared at him teasingly. "I tried the copy machine line the first time but that didn't work. Then I think it was like a year later we met again after you left a book signing, carrying around that damn book of yours."

She smacked him playfully with the back of her hand. "Hey that book is important to me. Maybe if you bothered to read it you would understand."

"Reading is for squares besides, I don't need a book when I've got the main character right here in bed with me." he jokes pressing his lips to the top of her head.

She chuckled lightly turning so she is resting on her forearms so she could look at him. He does not speak, only looks back with a gaze that resembles confusion. A smile tugs at the corners of her lips as she moves closer towards him still. He knows she is about to kiss him, yet as she presses her lips against his, ecstasy shoots through his veins. Immediately he is completely lost within her. She can feel his firm hands take their on her hips as she moves up his body. It takes him only another moment to flip them over his lips running along the skin of her chest. Time does not seem to matter as they lose themselves once again, the morning slipped away without them caring at all.

---

Lucas Scott lay awake at night his eyes boring into the ceiling. He had not been able to sleep much for writers block plagued the author in recent weeks. His editing company had not pressured him to begin writing a new book, but he still felt some sort of obligation to try given how successful his first novel was proving.

He turned his head to look to Lindsey Strauss who was sleeping peacefully to his left completely oblivious to his dilemma at hand. She of all people had been his biggest supporter and fan encouraging him as much as she could when he initially sat down and began to write his second book.

The first night the outlook seemed promising as began the first chapter. He made an attempt to write through the night though most of what he started never made it passed the delete button. Lindsey was sympathetic and she continued to be only irking Lucas farther. Recently, he had taken to lying about his progress and stated numerous times that he was not sure if he wanted to publish this book and that he would begin on another.

A vital piece of him felt like it was missing. There was something in his life that never had closure, something that still left a pang in his heart. The answer was there it was his book signing in L.A. almost a year and a half ago. He had called Peyton not just because he missed her, but he truly wanted to see her. When she did not show a vital piece of him began to feel empty. He could recall that day almost perfectly, he was absolutely excited to be in L.A….

_The sun was bright out. L.A. never looked more beautiful. He was in high spirits despite the nervousness that had already begun to eat away at him. Lindsey came into his view after her brief conversation with the store owner. He had been counting down the minutes since they had arrived eager to get on with the day. He and Lindsey stood behind a table overlooking the many people milling about, people he hoped wanted him to sign their copy of his book._

_Lindsey looked to him with optimism shining in her gaze. "You ready?"_

_He sighed, "I guess so."_

_She pressed her lips innocently against his cheek. It was a simple kiss of reassurance and good luck. She wanted great things for him and this was only the start and she truly believed it._

_People approached him, simply gushing over the story he told asking numerous times about Peyton. Peyton. He was distracted straining to see of over the crowd of people hoping she would show. Person after person approached the table, he signed and posed for pictures. He would look towards the next person with optimism only to be disappointed when they did not resemble Peyton._

_The last of the crowd cleared out leaving himself and Lindsey completely alone. She turned to him with a smile radiating upon her face. "That was amazing Luke." she gushed throwing her arms around him._

_He chuckled softly wrapping his arms around her. "Thanks, couldn't have done without you though."_

_She pulled away from him. "Your writing was always amazing Lucas. I just paved the way for your greatness."_

_A true smile molded upon his lips and his cheeks burned a light shade of blue. Working with Lindsey had been nothing short of a pleasure. She was kind and caring and whipped him into shape when editing needed to be done. Maybe what he had been missing was right in front of him the whole time._

_He cleared his throat, "What do you say you and I go celebrate for a night on the town."_

_Lindsey's eye lit up, "Of course." _

_Though he meant for his intentions to be pure he could not help but look for Peyton everywhere they went. At dinner his eyes wandered constantly, double taking when he thought he saw her blonde curls. After a few drinks he no longer cared._

From then on Lucas and Lindsey were a couple. Sometimes he lay awake at night much like this one and wondered what would have been different if Peyton had showed up had he gone out on the town with Peyton that night. Lindsey was there she was there every step of the way since she stepped into his life. She loved him and he loved her and he would never deny that. Yet there were still things that bothered him and made him wonder.

His eyes sought the clock which flashed two am. He sighed deeply rubbing his eyes and turning over to his side hoping sleep would take him. The silence, however, drove him insane. He threw the sheets from his body carefully rising from bed as not to wake Lindsey and made his way to the bathroom.

With a quick flick of the faucet he splashed cold water upon his face. Maybe he was losing it, but he really could not be sure. Lies and deceit, though it was petty, was eating at him. He could not keep lying to Lindsey about his progress with his book. But he could not keep telling himself that he did not want to know. He wanted to know why she never showed. He needed to know why.

"Come on Lucas you're fine." he whispered to himself rubbing his eyes furiously. He took one good long look at himself in the mirror and immediately needed to look away. Tired lines were forming beneath his eyes coupled with dark circles. He had not realized how his late nights were affecting him.

Closure was needed and questioning himself was not going to settle his restless curious mind. He needed to know and he knew how he was going to do it.


	2. False Pretenses

**Chapter Two: False Pretenses **

Lindsey was surprised to find bags packed and sitting at the edge of Lucas' bed when she awoke the next morning. What worried her most was that Lucas was not soundly asleep next to her. She rubbed sleep from her eyes rising from the bed and tentatively called out his name. When no answer was called back out to her she rose from the bed and went to find him.

Every room in the house was vacant. Lucas was never one to leave without giving her some inclination where he had gone. Her next thought was to see if his car was still in the driveway. As she opened the front door a figure to her left jumped slightly scaring her.

"Oh god Lucas you scared me half to death. How long have you been out here?" she asked still clutching her chest.

Lucas regained his composure resting his cheek on his fist. "I don't know awhile maybe. I couldn't sleep last night so I didn't want to wake you." he grunted his eyes still fixated out into the street.

There was something about Lucas that bothered Lindsey. It was not just the indifferent tone in his voice but the fact he was not looking at her. He did not even turn to face her after she had scared him. She wanted to scream _"Look at me for god sakes." _The words, however, caught in her throat and she decided to continue to try to be positive though his behavior was more than worrisome.

"Why couldn't you sleep? Where you up late writing?" she tried still making an honest attempt to avoid asking why there were bags packed in his room. Something was not adding up between his behavior and the bags this was strange even for Lucas.

Lucas sighed shifting his position crossing over his left leg. "I tried to write for awhile nothing good came of it so I decided to go to sleep. But I just couldn't fall asleep so yeah I ended up out here."

"Oh." Lindsey trailed off now feeling uncomfortable standing on the porch in her pajamas. She wanted to scream at him hit him anything to make him look at her it was driving her insane. "I was going to make some breakfast I was wondering if you wanted some." she tried weakly as her fingers grasped the doorknob.

"No. I'll be in a minute." he husked not even bothering to pay much attention to her question.

"Okay." Lindsey murmured walking quietly inside tears beginning to leak from the corners of her eyes. She bypassed the kitchen making a beeline for the bathroom just barely locking the door before full fledged sobs escaped her being. She collapsed over the sink trying to come to terms with what had just transpired on the porch. Lucas Scott had never been distant towards her he was such a kind and loving person she could not place the reason why he was acting the way he was.

"Lindsey." she heard him call from the front door. Immediately she rose from her kneeling position running the faucet and splashing cold water upon her face. When she felt she looked presentable she emerged from the bathroom and made her way to the kitchen.

"Oh hey I was looking for you." he stated as she appeared in the hallway.

Lindsey inhaled deeply. "Well here I am." Silence fell between them. When her eyes sought Lucas a sudden pang flooded through her chest when she saw the guilt. Her little game of playing stupid was over she needed to know. The guilt written in his eyes was almost to much for her to bear.

"Listen Luke, I'm not going to play stupid or lie to myself anymore. You wouldn't even look at me this morning and there are bags packed sitting at the edge of your bed. So tell me what's going on." she finishes with her final bravado suddenly becoming weak as his intense burning gaze stares right through her.

Lucas Scott knows his façade is up. There is no point in lying to her any further. He takes a deep breath before he steps towards her though keeping his distance. "I haven't been myself lately. I haven't been able to write anything worth publishing or anything that I even like. I can't sleep at night because I can't write and I've lying to you about the progress of my book."

Lindsey rose an eyebrow, "you still haven't answered my question about the bags. That is really all I'm concerned about at this present moment." she states calmly though now she is angered by the fact that he had been lying to her for almost two months maybe even longer she was not quite sure yet.

"I need to get from Tree Hill for awhile at least. Maybe go see my mom and Lilly I don't know but I just need to get away and clear my head." his eyes dart away from her and to the floor.

"Okay, why didn't you just tell me all of this? I wish I could understand why all of this happening but I know you and you won't be happy with yourself until you get away so go." she states very plainly.

Lucas closes the space between them in three steps their faces only centimeters away from each other. Lindsey knows he will not kiss her, not yet anyway so she takes the initiative pressing her lips against his. There is something different about this kiss, something that is off. It does not feel like Lucas kissing her but someone else, but she pushes this from her head to try to commit this kiss to memory since they had not had much intimate contact recently.

Lucas pulls away without another word and takes flight to his bedroom and reappearing only seconds later with bags draped over either shoulder. Lindsey forms a weak smile upon her lips. "Goodbye" she murmured tears beginning to brim in her eyes.

"Bye Linds." he whispered brushing his lips against hers before he departs.

The tears begin to leak from her eyes as she finds herself standing alone in the middle of his house, the memory of this morning still ghosting over her. He did not even say goodbye but that was not even the root of their problems.

---

Today was a rare day for Julian and Peyton both, for the first time in months they both had the day off prompting an exclusive day just to themselves. Needless to say they slept right through the alarm only when the clock read twelve oh three did Peyton finally stir. She felt fully energized ready for whatever the day brought them but her stomach was empty and that needed to be taken care of before anything else came about for the day.

She slid from her bed careful not to wake Julian who was still sound asleep on the other side of the bed. Padding quietly to the kitchen she opens the drawn blinds letting light flood into her apartment. As she rummaged through her cabinets Peyton stops becoming disappointed that there is absolutely no food in her apartment. Clearly she and Julian had forgotten to do grocery shopping this week.

"Good morning sexy." she hears the deep rumble of his voice from the doorway. A smile instantly parts her lips as she flies across the room and into his arms. Their lips meet in a simple kiss though the heat is quickly on as Julian pulls her close to his body intensifying the kiss. Peyton moans into his mouth and Julian seizes the opportunity to entwine their tongues. Her arms wrap around his neck and her lips trail to his jaw line stringing kisses as they move.

It takes Julian only another moment the hoist both of her legs over his hips as he walks them over to the counter. He sets her gently down but then resumes his attack. She can feel his lips everywhere roaming over every inch of her skin and his warm breath in her ear as he whispers a string of 'I loves yous' which sends through the roof. Julian finds her lack of clothing most efficient this afternoon in the heat of moment. Most times before they made love he took his time removing each piece of her clothing but now there was no time to waste. It was a race to the finish for both of them while his hands worked eagerly beneath her worn three sizes too big hoodie finding the soft fabric that belonged to her underwear.

Peyton giggles pulling away from him a wide smile parting both her lips. "You're such a naughty boy." she murmurs seductively running her fingertip along his lips. His devious smile indicates everything as he crashes his lips against hers. Her hands work flawlessly as his gym shorts fall the ground leaving him clad in only his boxers a sight she loves best. But her focus is not on that right now in fact she can not focus at all as Julian has his way with sliding his panties down her legs. She moans a cry of anticipation but he is not that easily affected.

"Oh we're playing this my way today." he whispers in purely teasing seductive voice.

---

Lucas stood outside a door branded with a number that read 24B. He had been standing out here for awhile now trying to pluck up the courage to raise his arm and knock. Every time he tried though, he felt his arm go limp at his side. He suddenly feels awkward standing alone in the hallway looking like a poor pathetic lost soul or a boy crawling back to his girlfriend after a fight. He does not want to be that guy, but now he feels like he is. He knows she is just behind the white door but to see her again after all this time after so many unanswered questions leaves him feeling unworthy of her presence. However, Lucas Scott did not fly across the country just to stand here like an awkward human. He needed answers and he wanted answers. Triumphantly, he raises his arm rapping his knuckles against the wood and waits. It is the only thing he can do.

---

Peyton hears the light knock at her door causing her to pull away from Julian. He looks up to her confused but her look is even more confused that his. No one ever knocked on her door. In fact she was not sure if anyone actually knew where she lived. Just as Julian presses his lips against hers once more the knock interrupts them causing Julian to groan in frustration. "Just ignore it." he husks fiercely placing his hand upon her hip.

Peyton shakes her head no, "Come on Julian we have all day to play around. Besides it's rude."

He does not put up a fight and lets her slide down from the counter. "Uh can you answer the door though?"

Peyton looks to him confused then chuckles softly as she sees his erection poking from beneath the fabric of his boxers. "Sure no problem." She pulls on her underwear and Julian's basketball shorts then proceeded to tie her hair into a messy knot. She turns the doorknob slowly and then opened the door to reveal someone. Her smile was immediately wiped from her face and she looked as if she had just seen a ghost.

"Lucas."

* * *

**Author's Note: What I really wanted to show here and the last chapter was the direct contrast between the two relationships. Lucas and Lindsey are barely intact while Peyton and Julian seem all happy go lucky and stronger than ever. So I'm really at a crossroads of where I'll be taking it. Thanks for the reviews they are my sex. Obvs.**


	3. Make Right With You

**Chapter Three: Make Right With You**

"Peyton." he responded his blue eyes narrowing into a squint as he looked to her, a fixture of beauty standing before him.

Peyton inhaled a sharp breath closing the door behind her. Words seemed to fail her in that moment as she stared back at the man who had once stolen and broke her heart. He looked older than she remembered, and tired too. Yet, there was still that beautiful innocence written between the tired lines in his face that she loved and the way his blue eyes seemed to burn right through her. But she was with Julian now, and looking at Lucas brought back a memory she was trying so hard to forget.

"What are you doing here Lucas?" she asked him sharply deciding it was better to get to the point than to play word games with him.

Lucas opens his mouth to respond but he closes it suddenly finally taking a true good look at Peyton. He notices something different, her cheeks are flushed red and he can see a love bite on her neck where her hair had not covered. Instantly his heart drops and his only instinct is to run, run far away and never look back. However, it is not that simple at this point. His legs feel like lead and he cannot seem to pull himself from the spot he is currently standing.

"Is there…" he tries and fumbles over his words. "…is there a man in your apartment? Are you seeing someone else?" he finally manages to splutter out.

She reads the hurt in his eyes and immediately tears hers away. She simply cannot bear to see his heart break in front of her. "Well what did you expect Lucas?" she replies shortly turning to open the door and make a quick escape.

However, she was not as lucky for Lucas caught her by the wrist before she could flee. He stares long and hard for moment trying to find words to speak. "Come meet me tonight. I'll be at the café around the corner from here at seven." he reads her face and suddenly retracts from his statement. "I know you don't owe me anything and I know it's been a long time. But please, I'm not asking you to fall into bed with me or anything. I just want to talk to you." he finishes finally releasing her wrist.

Peyton pauses for a moment looking from the floor back to Lucas. "Tonight at seven?" she asks confirming the time.

A light smile plays on the corner of Lucas' lips. "Tonight at seven." he repeats then watches her escape to behind her door. As he walks away his heart feels lighter if only slightly. She agreed to meet him. At least that was a step in the right direction.

Peyton leaned against the door feeling her heart pound against her chest. She regains composure making her way back into the kitchen to find Julian sitting at the table. He looks up to her with a smile.

"Who was that babe?" he asks nonchalantly seemingly unworried by anything.

"Someone offering to sell stupid crap. You know." she replies feeling the lie slide from between her teeth.

She makes her way towards Julian trying to push the thought of Lucas from the front of her brain. Julian does not seem to notice her as she creeps closer. Suddenly her lips are upon his in a gentle, tender kiss. He feels his body turn to hers, his arm wrapping around her only to pull her closer to his body. Julian knew there was unfinished business that needed attending to.

They are like sex crazed teenagers as they crash through their apartment locked at the lips while Julian pulls her clothing from her body. When they finally crash into the bedroom the two are clad in only their underwear hands groping for any place to touch on their lover's body.

There is nothing but numbness as she and Julian make love. Her hearts suddenly feels heavy and she feels guilty for lying to Julian. Every touch of his lips to hers numbs the pain in her heart. She loves Julian, she does. He took her in her darkest moments. He made an effort to know her when she had all but closed down to everyone around her.

"I love you." Julian murmurs in her ear and all of her questioning suddenly ceases. Julian loves her and that is all that should matters.

"I love you too Julian." she replies between kisses feeling his lips trail to her collar bone and chest. She brings his face between her hands stroking his cheek. He smiles broadly causing Peyton to smile in return. Her heart flutters inside her chest and everything feels right again. She brings his lips to hers savoring the taste he leaves on her lips as he pulls away.

The day passed with ease as they pranced about the apartment finding the kitchen counter as their next stop on their what seemed like endless sexcapade. They were in complete bliss until seven o' clock rolled around and everything shattered around Peyton.

"What are you doing?" Julian asks leaning against the frame of their bedroom as he watches her dress.

"I'm so sorry baby. The company just texted me and I have to go to meeting right now." she manages as she throws on a shirt presentable enough.

"Why can't you just ditch the meeting?" he suggests folding his arms over his chest.

"I would, but I would also like to have a job." she retorts back fastening her belt over her jeans.

"I'll be back before you know it babe." she whispers in his ear pulling his lips into a hard open mouth kiss. She felt his tongue barge into her mouth entwining his tongue with hers. As she pulls away his hand rests on her hip for just a minute longer staring deeply into her green irises.

"When you get home tonight you are mine until the morning." he whispers seductively pressing his lips to her ear and then let her go.

Peyton turns her head to look over her shoulder smiling so slightly at Julian as she watched her go. She made a quick escape from her apartment and proceeded to descend down the stairs rather quickly for fear she may chicken out before ever reaching the café.

The streets were already busy with excitement. People were hitting the local concert venues or lining up at the club long before it opened, hopeful to get in after all of the celebrities did. With a smile she shook her head rounded the corner and found herself staring at the café in which Lucas had asked to meet her.

She entered timidly her eyes darting about the small room hoping Lucas had chickened out himself. Yet after one more glance around the room her eyes finally landed on him sitting at a table towards the back. Her approach was slow and elaborate while taking deep breaths the entire way trying to form what she was going to say to him.

Lucas motions for her to sit in the seat across from him and she does so without so much as making a sound. There is a long pause causing a deafening silence to fall between them, neither daring so much as the move for fear it would cause the other to run for the hills.

Finally Lucas clears his throat and smiles softly. "Hey Peyton. I'm glad you came." he says confidently.

"Hi Luke." her reply is sharp and quick straight to the point.

"Uh… do you want some coffee or anything?" he asks thoroughly taken aback by the quickness of her response.

"No Lucas, I want to know why you show up in L.A. now Lucas? Why now? It's been almost a year and a half and you show up now?"

He inhales deeply trying to collect himself but the anger in her voice is his trigger. "No Peyton, I'm here because I can't finish a new goddamned book because I can't figure out why you didn't show up."

His response takes Peyton by surprise. She wants to yell at him back say something so mean and hurtful that it sends him scurrying back to Tree Hill, but she cannot. She just cannot find it in her heart to do so. "I was there Lucas. But I was scared. When you called and told me that you were going to be here I didn't know what to think. But I came because I missed you. Then I saw you with her, whoever she is and she kissed you so I took off." she bites at her lower lip as she finishes bringing her eyes up slowly to look at Lucas.

"You… you were there?"

Peyton nods fumbling with the hem of her shirt.

"Are you happy with this guy you're with?" he asks calmly.

"You have no right to ask me that." she retorts sharply narrowing her eyes at him.

"Please Peyton just answer the question. I'm not trying to pry I'm just asking." he tries again.

"Yes Lucas I'm happy with him. He makes me happy and that's all I can really ask for." she replies quietly.

"I miss you, Peyton." he whispers.

She bites back her response and suddenly feels trapped beneath his burning blue steel gaze. She rises from her chair giving Lucas an apologetic look. "I should go, Julian is waiting for me and I promised I would be back soon." she says quickly turning to leave.

Lucas, however, catches her arm turning her back to face him. "Peyton please. I miss you and I wouldn't be here if I didn't and I hope that because you're here you miss me too."

She stares back into his eyes and suddenly all of the feelings she thought she had buried came flooding back in one instant. "I miss you too Lucas." she murmurs softly.

A smile plays at the corner of Lucas' lips as he hears her speak those five words he had longed to hear since he arrived in L.A. He can feel his body gravitate closer to her and she does not fight it. It takes only a moment for their lips to touch in a heated, tension ridden kiss. His strong hand finds a resting place at her cheek as her hands wrap around his neck. She feels the kiss everywhere as their tongues entwine and bodies melt fearing nothing for in that moment it was just the two them and nobody else.

* * *

**Author's Note: Don't be too mad at me yet those of you how are rooting for Julian. I don't really have an idea of where I'm taking this yet and the one I have is still really vague. So hang in there. The kiss at the end between Lucas and Peyton was one of my favorite parts of writing this. But I can't tell you why just yet. Reviews please and thank you.**


	4. Breathing

**Chapter Four: Breathing**

Everything around Peyton begins to fade as her body melts into the strong embrace that is Lucas' arms. Their lips move in perfect time and their bodies mold together. Every touch between their bodies is perfect. They had once been so in love with every flaw. Yet even in the most perfect of moments between them, there hung a cloud of gray looming overhead. It threatened their sunshine with thunder and rain and soon Peyton became aware.

Suddenly she pulls away from Lucas as he looks back to her, his gaze full of want yet laced with hurt. However, Peyton knows his staring is the least of her worries. "Lucas…I can't. We can't." she manages to stutter out her eyes immediately seeking the floor. Not even an hour ago was she making love to a man only a block away, a man who she had grown to fall completely in love with. It so common and so dirty and it made Peyton's stomach turn.

"Peyton please don't go." he tries desperately but in the back of his mind he knows it is lost cause. She will not even look at him.

Peyton hastily grabs her purse and tries to avoid Lucas, but he is like a brick wall that she keeps hitting over and over again. "Lucas I'm not doing this again. We're not in high school. You have a woman to go home with and I'm sure she doesn't even know you're out here. And I have a man waiting for me at home to who I had to lie to. What's wrong with this picture Lucas?"

His mouth opens but no words seem to leave his tongue. He steps aside without another word and lets her pass him. Peyton throws a glance over her shoulder only to meet the sad puppy dog eyes that belonged to Lucas. She still walked forward, forcing herself not to turn to back to fall into his strong arms.

Lucas watches her leave digging his hands inside his pockets. He has nowhere to go. He cannot go home yet just to simply fall into routine with Lindsey. That is not what he wants his life to be like. Nathan had always told him there would be other women. The other women, though, could never hold even a fraction of the immense love he still felt for Peyton. Nothing could ever come close. He fights the urge to follow her back to her apartment. But he would have nothing planned to say, he may have even just stood outside her door all night. His fingers touch lightly against his lips and he can still feel the ghost of her last kiss and the soft sensual feeling she left behind. His head falls slightly as defeat and rejection suddenly set and the loneliness washes over his body.

Julian is sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for Peyton, as she enters. His smile immediately broadens as the blonde makes her presence known in the kitchen. He rises not soon after quickly wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close to him. He seems to take no notice in her flustered and sad gaze when he presses his lips against hers. Peyton is more than willing for the kiss pulling Julian tightly against her body for she just wanted to feel him against her.

"Hmm, that must've been one hell of an hour away from me." he murmurs seductively in her ear nipping at it softly with his teeth.

"You have no idea." she replies biting her lip at the underlying truth of her own words. One hell of hour was exactly how to describe the whirlwind that had been the conversation between her and Lucas.

Julian mistakes her lip biting gesture as a ploy to seduce him. Without delay he crashes his lips against hers allowing his tongue to entwine with hers. She moans loudly wrapping her hand around his neck as the heat from their bodies begins to increase. Everything that had happened prior no longer mattered to Peyton. Well in that moment. As Julian collapsed in a heap beside her everything from that evening came flooding back.

Peyton's whole world began to spin and she felt nauseous. Lucas' last kiss still felt heavy on her lips and the touches from his fingertips still lingered upon her skin. Then there was Julian the man who she had just spent almost the entire day in bed with. It should not have been as hard as she was making it. There should not even be a reason to choose. She was with Julian and Lucas had hurt her far too many times for her to go crawling back.

She turns over resting her chin upon the sweat slicked skin of Julian nestling her cheek into his shoulder. "I love you Julian Baker." she whispers running her nails through his barely there hair. A loud snore escapes from his mouth causing a smile to flicker upon Peyton's face and a light chuckle emit from her throat. "Sleep tight babe." she mutters as she too then tries to fall asleep.

Julian was gone when she woke up though he was a gentleman and left a note on the kitchen counter explaining why. She rolls her eyes and throws it in the trash before she begins her usual routine of making toast. When the toast and orange juice are completely polished off she grabs her bag and purse and heads out the door and on her way to work.

Today felt odd, maybe it had to do with the fact that she and Julian had just spent the past twenty-four hours basically having sex. It felt strange to be at work today. The memory of Lucas came haunting back to her and she could recall every detail of that fateful night three years ago. The night he proposed to her then left her. It left a pang in her chest and she found herself completely lost in the past.

"Peyton." rings a familiar voice from the opening of her cubical. Peyton looks up only to see Lucas standing there like a kicked puppy with his hands shoved deeply within his pockets.

"God Luke, are you stalking me at work now too?" she asks with a roll of her eyes turning away from him. Several seconds pass by in silence. "What do you want Lucas? Another kiss maybe?" he says in a voice laced with such sarcasm and anger.

Her words hit him hard in the chest as he feels like he has just been punched. He could not recall a time where she had spoken to him with such anger. "Actually, I came here to apologize to you." his voice shakes slightly and he is on the verge of tears.

"What?" she replies thoroughly taken aback yet again with his response. She turns in her chair to face him, her heart aching slightly at his defeated figure. Everything about his body language screams defeat.

"I came here to apologize to you and I know it's not enough. I took advantage of you and I'm sorry. It's not fair to you or the guy you're with. You're completely right this isn't high school and I've been acting so juvenile lately…"

"You don't have to apologize Lucas." she cuts him off rising from her chair.

Lucas' head jerks upwards and he raises a brow at her. "Wha… why?"

"Because it takes two to participate in a kiss and I'm just as much to blame as you are. I miss you Lucas, I do, but you hurt me so bad and that leaves a lasting impression. So don't say you're sorry Lucas because I know and you know that you really aren't. Don't come here looking for penance from me."

"Peyton please just try and listen to me. I'm sorry." he tries in desperation trying to convey on some level what he really is sorry for.

Peyton stares intently back into his steely blue eyes finally coming to the realization of what he is actually apologizing for. Her gasp catches in her throat and she finds herself unable to speak momentarily.

"Why did you leave Lucas?" she asks with tears welling in the corners of her eyes. The only thing she could think of was waking up the following morning only to find that he had left her. Their last night together just kept replaying over and over in her head like a movie.

"Because you said no." he replies bluntly though his version of those nights events are skewered if only slightly.

"I never said "no" Lucas. I said that I wanted to marry you, just not then but someday. I was nowhere near ready for marriage. I was fully committed to you, I just wasn't ready. I never thought that by saying someday it would mean you would leave me in that hotel room." she replies with exasperation throwing her hands into the air.

"Peyton you don't understand. I would have done anything, anything at all to make it work between us because the distance was doing us absolutely no good." he retorts back running his fingers through his spiky blond locks.

"The way to make it work between us was not to jump right to a marriage proposal but wait until I was ready. Not everything has to go at wrapped speed Lucas. What makes you think us getting married would have worked we were only nineteen!" her voice steadily begins to rise as anger resonates in her chest. Rehashing the past was not exactly what she had in mind for today. Yet the fact that she and Lucas were at each others throats made her feel secure in her relationship with Julian.

"Peyton we had only seen each other three days out of the year and we went days without talking. I missed you and I was starting to get lonely. I need you Peyton." he replies through gritted teeth suddenly closing the distance between them causing Peyton to step back from him at his sudden invasion of her space.

"I can't breathe Lucas. Since you've showed up I can't breathe. I'm suffocating and I could breathe just fine before you got here. You're everywhere. You're at my front door, you're at my workplace, you're in my head when I'm trying to have sex or when I'm trying to have a moment of peace. You are sucking up all of my oxygen and I don't know how to handle it. I can't breathe with you here Lucas."

Silence overcomes them as Peyton finishes her rage in the form of words. Lucas seems at a loss for words and his mouth opens slightly as he grasps for anything to say at all. Then their eyes lock, green to blue and they become wrapped in a tangled vortex. It was the worst thing that could have happened for Peyton because now she is stuck, trapped beneath the intense gaze of Lucas Scott. It is like their in the café all over again as their bodies slowly begin to gravitate towards each other.

Lucas pauses before he meets his lips against hers feeling as though they are still teenagers wrapped in awkwardness. Keeping the kiss office friendly was the last thing on their minds as tongues entwined and hands snaked beneath clothes. Finally she broke for air with a smile coursing upon her lips. She was completely lost within herself and when she finally realized Lucas was diving in for another kiss she instantly backed away.

Lucas opens his eyes with sadness. "Peyton." he tries plainly.

"I can't breathe with you. I can't do this thing with you. I have a man waiting for me, a man who loves me unconditionally, who won't cheat on me." her voice falters at the end as she thinks of Julian.

"I love you Peyton."

"Stop it Lucas. Stop it right now. There is a woman waiting for you in Tree Hill for you to come home. We can't do this Lucas. Not now not ever. Please just leave so I can breathe again." she turns her head away and listens as he turns and leaves. Her head clears and her thoughts immediately jump to Julian who promised he would be home early.

---

Tears well in her eyes as she enters through her front door to find Julian sitting in the front room reading the paper. He looks up at her smiling. "Hey you." he greets nonchalantly returning his eyes back to the paper.

"Julian." she stammers.

He looks up from his paper again and notices the tears in her eyes for the first time. As he raises a brow he sets the paper down. "Peyton what is it?"

"I…I… I need to tell you something."

* * *

**Author's Note: So I wasn't quite sure what to do with this chapter so it is really more Lucas and Peyton focused more angst driven. However, don't be disappointed with how I've written Julian and Peyton because as I develop the plot more I'll be going more in depth with their relationship. So thank you for reading and reviewing I appreciate it.**


	5. Start Again

**Chapter Five: Start Again**

Julian rises from the chair with concerned eyes and he takes a step towards Peyton. "Peyton, baby, what's wrong?" he asks in soft, comforting voice but it only makes the tears fall faster.

"No please just sit down Julian. Just please sit down. I don't deserve your sympathy." she says between sobs as she wipes away the tears from her eyes.

Julian listens backing away and falling lightly into the chair. No doubt he is concerned and worried, but her last statement makes him wonder why she was really crying. It had been awhile since they had a decent and meaningful conversation, but work could be placed to blame. They had both grown so busy lately when they finally did get a day off they used it for sex. It never once crossed his mind that their conversations had been short or so meaningless that he soon forgot them.

"Okay Peyton, just tell me what's wrong." he replies again using his comforting voice.

She collects herself, wiping away the tears and inhaling several times. Slowly the words form in her head but she does not know where to start. Then is comes to her and she begins to speak.

"You know about Lucas Scott." Julian nods. "I lied to you last night when I said I had a meeting. Lucas was the one who had showed up at our door he asked me to meet him so I did." she pauses and looks towards Julian.

"Okay." he states plainly thought still confused.

"We talked and things escalated and I wanted… I tried to leave, but I kissed him. Then today he showed up at my work and we kissed again. I'm sorry Julian." she bites at her lip her eyes seeking any place but him and they find a resting place on the floor.

"You kissed him." is his only response as her last statement begins to sit with him.

"Yes. I'm so sorry Julian. I love you."

His body suddenly becomes rigid and his face turns to stone. She watches him unable to speak when everything has been said. Several moments pass with the only sounds coming from outside and the tick of the clock. Finally after a few minutes Julian rises from his chair and starts towards the door.

"Julian wait, please don't go." she pleads grasping his arm between her hand.

His eyes meet hers but he speaks no words. There is no anger in his face, just hurt and sadness. It breaks Peyton's heart but she knows if she does not right her wrong she and Julian do not have a chance. She gives one last pleading face. Julian does not respond. He looks away and heads out the door leaving Peyton standing alone crying softly to herself.

---

Lucas sighs quietly falling on to the bed his eyes boring into the ceiling. Her words cut through his chest like a serrated knife. He sighs in frustration trying to settle within the sheets but the thoughts are running rampant through his head. Restlessness seems to take precedent as he turns about beneath the comforter unable to settle in. He groans loudly punching the too soft pillow and it does nothing for him. It only makes him angrier as it absorbs his blow.

He lays still for another five minutes thinking that maybe fatigue would take him if he did not dare to make a move. However, this proved to be ineffective as his mind kept turning gears. All he could do was lay there and reply the scene in her office over and over again as if his brain were on repeat. His entire felt numb, completely void of emotion. The only thing he could feel was the sensation of their tension ridden kiss sitting heavily upon his lips and the feel of her hands on his skin. Just the thought ran a shiver down his spine.

She was far too gone now. She was with Julian and even to Lucas she seemed generally happy. He sighs again his stomach turning over at the thoughts of another man putting his hands all over her, making love to her, kissing all the secret parts of her skin that he had known long before him. It was nauseating at first thought.

He turns over fumbling for his phone squinting as he scrolled through his contacts searching for the number. There was no use for him to be in L.A. anymore. Had gotten exactly what he was looking for, an answer. Was he so naïve to think that she would have been waiting faithfully for him? The phone rings in his ear and though it is late she dutifully picks up.

"Hello?" she murmurs groggily into the receiver still boarding on the line of consciousness.

"Lindsey." he replies suddenly remembering the time difference between them.

His voice seems to do the trick and she immediately perks up. "Lucas, what's the matter why are you calling so late at night?" she asks unable to hide the worry laced within her voice.

"I just wanted to call and let you know I'm coming home tomorrow." he tries to sound excited but the attempt is weak and wan. He only hopes she is still too tired to notice the distance in his voice.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" she asks with curiosity.

Lucas sighs pondering the answer over in his head. "In a sense yes, but it also opened the door for so many more questions that I have to look within myself to answer." he replies hoping that answer was generic enough for her. Truth was, Peyton's response to his question had paved the way for many unanswered questions and what ifs. If anything it only furthered his frustration when he thought about them too much.

"Oh." she sounds surprised at his response. "I can't wait for you to come home. Even though it's only been a few days I've really been lonely." she continues. Though she would not… could not forget their conversation before he left. It still sits most heavily in her chest. Though she tried to let that pain go. She truly did miss him, his smile and everything else. It would be nice to have her rock home where he belonged.

"I've missed you too." he replies sincerely.

Lindsey chuckles, "Good."

"Oh and Lindsey." he begins.

"Yeah?" she asks quizzically.

"I love you."

"I love you too Lucas."

They hang up at the same time and Lucas falls back into the pillows with a smile. His life was not a complete disaster. At least not yet anyway. Though he was still at ends on whether or not to tell Lindsey about his adventure in L.A. Finally, he decides it is best not to for it would only complicate things on a seemingly higher level. No, the best thing to do now was leave L.A. quietly and let all of the sour memories settle here right where they belonged. Though no memory of Peyton Sawyer could ever be considered sour in Lucas' head.

To avoid any persisting restlessness Lucas rose from his bed and began to busy himself with packing his things. The exercise seemed to work at least temporarily. He sighs as he realizes he has packed everything up and managed to clean up the entire room. He gently hits the pillows where he rests his head and eventually falls asleep. Yet his head still swirls with memories of the last two days.

---

Peyton sits in the front of room of their apartment staring intently at the door. She has not eaten only sipped at a bottle of water. Of course she has cried, her eyes were a dead giveaway. They were red, swollen and puffy. She has not moved since Julian had left. She groans to herself as the clock turns to midnight letting her fall slightly. Maybe he was not coming home. And even if did, he was not stupid he would come while she was at work to gather his things. Eventually all of her crying puts her to sleep in the chair curled into a ball with her arms wrapped around herself.

Julian quietly opens the door hoping to sneak back in, in hopes to sleep on the couch then disappear before Peyton wakes. He is clearly surprised when he finds her curled on the chair where he had been sitting previously. He takes a step hoping to pass by without waking her, but he steps on the one and only creaky floor board. He groans and Peyton begins to stir from her sleep.

"Julian?" she whispers barely able to make out the dark figure that stands in front of her. Her eyes have not yet adjusted to the darkness and she wishes whoever was there would just answer her.

Julian sighs giving up his façade. "Peyton."

Finally her eyesight adjusts and she sits upright groping for the lamp on the end table. With a light click, the lamp immediately turns on dimly illuminating the small front room. Shadows dance along Julian's face that make it nearly impossible to read, and suddenly Peyton feels as though she may be sleeping alone tonight.

"Julian, I need to tell you that I'm sorry. It was only a kiss. It didn't mean anything. I love you Julian Baker and only you. Please don't let this tear us apart." she pleads in whisper her voice begins to crack as tears well in green eyes.

Julian grits his teeth together, "I wouldn't care less who you kissed. Anyone, anyone but Lucas Scott. The guy who wrote a whole book about you, shows up in L.A. and kisses you and you expect me not to let it tear us apart." he replies angrily as his temper threatens to jump out of control.

"I didn't mean anything Julian!" she shouts back. "He came back to talk to me for answers that I apparently denied him for two years. He kissed me twice Julian. I still came back, I didn't run off and leave with him because I love you Julian."

"You think just by you coming back to me it's supposed to fix everything and we're just going to pretend like it never happened?" he questions throwing his hands up in the air.

"Julian can't we just—" She beings but it quickly cut off by Julian.

"I have no interest in going to back to the way things used to be." he spats in her direction.

"I wasn't going to say that. Why don't you let me finish?" she pauses and inhales before she begins again. "I want to move forward. I have no interest in going back either. I want this to make our relationship stronger. We've gone days without having meaningful conversations. We've become complacent with our lives. I miss how we used to be when we first started dating, of course I do. But I have no intentions of reverting back to that. I want you Julian, flaws and all. But I want you still want me, flaws and all." she finishes staring back at the man she loves with pleading eyes. She simply cannot bear to lose the one constant thing in her life. She is more than grateful than that "thing" is a man who she loves unconditionally as he does to her.

Julian sighs and a small smile flickers over his face. "Peyton of course I love every bit of you. I just can't seem to wrap my mind around Lucas Scott kissing you. I can't stay mad at you. I forgive you Peyton. I'm glad you came back and you told me."

Peyton sighs in relief. "I'm glad you came back too." she replies with a smile.

Julian closes the gap between them in less than a step and takes her delicate face between his hands. It only takes seconds for their lips to meet in a passionate embrace. Suddenly warmth seems to flow through them and their hearts beat out of control. They cuddle in the small chair simply talking and laughing and eventually sleeping. It pains Peyton when he has to leave in the morning. However, nothing was sweeter than when he would return home.

* * *

**Author's Note: Sorry it took me forever to get this chapter up. I went through a rough patch in my life and with writing and I couldn't bring myself to finish this chapter. So I apologize again. I hope you're all not too mad at me. I'm gonna try to get the next chapter out sooner. :] **


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